Guy who sends me stuff sends me a wunnerful blooper from the Tyler Morning Telegraph:
When William B. Holsonbake of Hughes Springs celebrated his 100th birthday last May 15, someone asked him how he had managed to become a centurion.
Read it all here, but the punchline is right there, living to age 100 and getting to be a centurion. If I make it to 100, I hope they don't make me learn Latin; second-language acquisition gets really hard in the advanced years.
My correspondent did remark, 'Pat, I hope you make it to triple digits, because you would cut quite the dashing figure in a big red-plumed helmet. And I'm certain you could put the sword to good use, smiting the ignorant and the illiterate[.]'
Well, we smote that East Texas turkey, anyhow. That 'centurion' is just another one of those painful missteps that happen when a writer substitutes for an unknown word a known word that's kinda close. In a happier world, a good editor would catch the blunder. In this world, all the editors are in meetings or updating their social pages or talking about their Tweets or something similarly useless.